Sam should never be stuck behind a slow driver
by Amanda Strange
Summary: Sam get stuck behind a slow driver and uses some language the leave Mikeala speechless and Bumblebee questioning his choice in words. I edited all of the mistakes out of it and now its fixed, enjoy!


Authors note- This was actually something that I went through earlier in the week, i was literally stuck behind the slowest ass hole in the world and i really wanted to just ram him outta my way.

Disclaimer-I wish i owned transformers but sadly i don't if i did Sam/Shia would be a decepticon and autobot supporter. XD

Rated M for strong language and some weird ass randomness, XD

Flamers not welcome. SO PISS OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-----------This messed up crack fic is brought to you by-

Krisco- don't know exactly what its used for but i know it hurts like hell when its mistaken for sunscreen and sits on body for more than 2 hours------------

It was a hot ordinary day-well as ordinary as it could get for young Samuel Witwickey and his beautiful chevy comaro that was actually an alein robot. After a long day of finishing up mid term exams for collage same was happy for christmas vacation so he could go back home and see his family that was now liveing at the autobot base because with all that was going on in egypt three weeks ago and the Decepticons still after not only sam and the Autobots but now everyone ho knew and cared for.

Mikeala sat in the seat next to him in the bumblebee texting her friend linsy about an upcoming concert and who was going when Sam just out of no where yelled.

"Move, oh my god is this guy like 100? why is he going so slow?"

"Maybe hes a senior citizen Sam, you know how they are." Mikeala responded going back to her texting, typing at lightening speed which sam watched in amazement.

"You gotta teach me how to type that fast."

"I would but as always you time is occupied with 'Bee."

"What did i do?" The yellow comaro finally spoke after along silent hour of sulking because he was low on gas and Sam was refusing to pay those prices for gas when he could just get free gas at the base.

"Aside from stealing my boyfriend from me? Nothing at all."

"Hey that wasn't my fault, i told Sam how i felt and so i could get it of my mind, i didn't expect him to feel the same way and-well, you know."

"its ok 'Bee, i'm just still not used to it, besides we weren't into eachother as much as we thought and i was planning to break up with him anyway. We're still friends though."

"You know i'm still here right?" Sam interjected boredly after still being stuck behind the same slow driver.

"Yeah, Why?" Mikeala responded with a cheeky grin.

"Nevermind, i just want this guy to move already."

"Sam maybe hes having car trouble."

"My scans say his car is completely fine if not needing a bit of a tune up, Hes just going slow for some reason" Bumblebee said matter-of-factly.

"Then he should be moving faster." Sam said heatedly

The three sat in silence for what felt like an etenity but was actually a few minutes and Sam just finally snapped and yelled.

"JESUS CHRIST!!!! I SAID MOVE MOTHER FUCKER, WHAT DO YOU NEED TO BE DRIVING AT 40 MILES AN HOUR IN THIS GODDAMNED LANE FOR WHEN THERES A PERFECTLY GOOD LANE DIRECTLY TO YOUR RIGHT, ASSFUCK?!?!?!?! OH YOUR GOING TO USE YOUR BREAKS NOW BITCH I BET YOU THINK THATS FUNNY. WELL LETS SEE HOW FUNNY YOU THINK IT IS WHEN THEY'RE EXTRACTING MY GODDAMN CAR FROM YOUR FUCKING TAILPIPE YOU CUNT!!!!!!! GODDAMMIT MOVE TURD SUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Mikeala and bee just sat there and stared-well just sat there in 'Bees case- in dis beliefe at Sam. Never hearing him ust that kind of language before ever or even so much as rant in his life. Then 'Bee finally spoke.

"Whats a cunt?"

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Well let me know what you think, i literally got the rant from a a pic from the bumper stickers app on myspace that i just loved and i gues memorized, the pic was awesome and just added to the hilarity of the rant, it was a pic of a cat at the steering wheel of a car i guess in the process of meowing. anyway leave me a review, i accept everying except flamers, flamers will be bitch slapped. Don't hate.


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